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       Our on-line catalogue features products you just gotta have right now. Most of the items you'll find here are created and designed by Tim Novak. You may have come here from our winter hiking website looking to become a "member". You'll find the HAE membership package at the bottom of this page.

Official HAE GAMES store


   
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Official HAE Membership
$15.95

       Do you have what it takes to be on the HAE Winter Wilderness Survival Team? You do if you have some cash. That's right, a paltry payment in US dollars and YOU are in! Just like the rich clients dying on Mount Everest, you can buy your way into the HAE experience. Aside from the elevated social status and admiration from co-workers and colleagues, an official HAE membership includes:


  • Your file at every ranger station, forest management headquarters and game warden's office in the United States.
  • No charge for admission to any of HAE's free seminars.
  • Possible exclusion from Arbor Day festivities, environmental activist events and women's group luncheons.
  • Stern warnings from your parents.
  • Strip search at the entrance of all National Parks, State Forests and public campgrounds in America.
  • Schedule of AA meetings in your area.
  • The name of a good therapist and a good lawyer.
  • Increased harrassment from law enforcement officials.
  • An awesome HAE Deforestation Tour tee shirt.
  • A classic and essential HAE lighter
  • The haeadventure.com bumpersticker
  • and, of course.... The Official HAE Membership card

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